when I was little, I went through a phase where I’d wear my Spiderman costume under all my clothes, so I wore it for about 3 years straight and my mom never found out until one day when we were at a family party, I was wearing the costume under a really fancy and expensive dress, and someone started choking on something so I ripped off the dress to reveal the costume to try and save them, and I think my mom just about had a heart attack
i bought a rubber duck today that is actually jesus holding a lamb but it’s a rubber duck too look at it
why is a nip slip such a big deal like ??? you have a nipple??? on your boob???? wtf???? a boob nipple???? that’s fucked up put it away????? no. there are men walking around out there full on topless with both nipples blazing loud and proud so you can take your anti girl nipple bullshit and shove it up your tiny asshole
Soldiers in Belarus found a little squirrel and brought it to the Warrant officer. The squirrel was very weak and about to die, so the officer took care of it and fed it like a baby every four hours.
Three months ago the guy left the army and now works as a taxi driver and the squirrel is always in his pocket no matter where he goes!
Be still my beating heart.
oh my god.